Lambchop and I mulled over having Sexy Thursday, but due to supremely sexy circumstances beyond our control, we decided to cancel Thursday for this week. Glad that’s not hanging over our heads any longer! We have moved on, to the grand tradition of Fuck You Friday! What happens on Fuck You Friday? A lot can [...]
I honestly can’t remember why I ever saved this picture to my “MUST USE” folder, but then again, why wouldn’t I have saved it? Perhaps it’s a commentary on impostor syndrome or the vulnerability of the creative state, or perhaps it’s an accurate description of my preferred workplace dress code. We’ll never know, will we? [...]
Darlings, I find I get much more service when I take my shirt off. It’s a game changer in any argument. Try it. Today, I just don’t even know! Things, stuff, goings on. New Hampshire loves a wing nut, so that’s not surprising. Santorum in the rear? This stuff writes itself. You don’t need me, [...]
First David Bowie takes our livestock, and now our entitlement programs? Bless him. If he can give the gift of swagger to the world and all its little Timberlakes and Biebers, he is allowed a measly check on the first of the month. I hope he is enjoying a lovely party with lots of “Sexty-five” [...]
Hey girl, I had a better run than I did in 2010. At least I was not run over, unlike my poor Lambchop. I did not lack for Klonopin, have surgery, move, or have any important breakdowns. I added many witty and attractive friends to my roster, and most of my existing friends remained witty [...]
Much has transpired in 2011. I have gone from sitting around in my underwear to sitting around in my underwear. In the Caribbean. Well, in two weeks. Mo’ money, mo’ problems. So where have I been? My brain is constantly buzzing. It rarely gets me anywhere. As a thought publisher, I become confused as to [...]
Camus for lunch. Then a conflicted and nonsensical dinner. I have accepted absurdity, although I think it may be wrong to involve children or animals. If you’ll excuse me, I have a closet system to install. Share:
My heart says yes. My brain says I’m not good enough. My gut says move to Belize. I’ll let them fight it out, as none of them are getting out alive. In the meantime, I will wear the shoes of authority and hope for the best. What does that ancient sage Liz Phair say? “It’s [...]
Right now, I’m taking a break from rolling around on the floor, giggling. My work here is literally done. Not at Vomitola HQ, mind you. Lambchop and I sued for sexiness discrimination the last time they tried to oust us. It’s true: in America, you cannot be dismissed for being too attractive. Thank God we [...]
Let us never forget…that Americans are resilient, quickly regaining a complete lack of shame in only ten short years. Thank you, Operation Enduring Zuckerberg. I think that calls for a palate cleanser: No? Too angry? How about… Now THAT’s better. America, I am looking for a brand new lover. In not totally unrelated news, last [...]
