Tag Archives: paula abdul

technical difficulty

Some recent search terms:

paula abdul’s bruises


monkey face

bad taste photo olan mills

cher’s dog

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married horse

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pictures of spider bites

evil phones

i wish i had an evil twin lyrics

There you have it. A hearty nod to the soul searching for the “I Wish I Had an Evil Twin” lyrics. Lambchop and I have selected this as “Our Song.” It keeps the perverts away! We had a lovely time seeing Mr. Merritt live the other night, although we had to tune out a slew of ironic t-shirts and thick glasses. I even spotted an indie rock pedant of Christmas past!

I am taking the bold step of moving hosting in the next few days, so please excuse any dead air. Funny, I do this kind of thing for clients without screwing up, but since I’m not paying me, I can only assume I’ll be somewhat careless. We’ll be back as soon as we can, bringing you more gumjobs, man batter, and leaky horse sex with Cher and Paula Abdul.


Romeo and Juliet, they never felt this way I bet

Now I bring you garish tidings of the Valentine’s Day candy retailing season. Vomitola loves you.

In other news, the Golden Globes were on last night! I think some people won some stuff. I was too busy eating my weight in cheese fries at the Outback, like a good American. Or as Mr. H said, “a good Australian.” Lambchop obviously didn’t catch the awards fever either, she was watching Das Boot and brandishing a trident. In the two seconds that I did see, Sofia Coppola accepted an award wearing flat shoes. Kudos.

I hope Nicole Kidman did not win anything for that wretched Cold Mountain. Mr. H has taken to mortifying me in public by repeating that clip where she says “I marry you, I marry you, I marry you,” replete with bad falsetto southern accent. He doesn’t understand why they keep showing that particular clip.

His take: “Is this movie about a retarded hot chick? Jude Law is thinking ‘This hot chick is retarded! I am going to score!'”

I guess it’s no more annoying than when the DeBeers ads are on around the holidays and he feels the need to hoot “I LOVE THIS WOMAN!” in parking lots.