My snout is cold and wet like that of a basset hound

Current mood: EAT EAT EAT

Current music: something catchy from Aimee Mann about being a sad drunk at christmas
Current terror level: financial, existential

I am talking to a flooring company about doing something to some floors. Their slogan is “A walk in the woods brought home.” For some reason, I’m picturing something involving ticks or lice. I should just gnaw my own floors like a beaver.

Earlier, I was eating leftover lasagna, and I had to ask the question “Hey, are you gonna barf on the bed?” And the answer was a barf. Thanks, cat. Luckily I caught it in a bowl, but this meant I couldn’t finish the lasagna. Problems: we all have them. Why was I eating near a bed anyway? It was the office bed. Don’t you have one? There was a time when I had to sleep under my desk, like peasant. But no more! Sometimes I take calls on the floor, but that’s just because I can.

What else can I do? So far today, I’ve been offended by the internets, and I’ve thought it was Wednesday. The parasite is bumping into walls, so I’m guessing it is offended by the internets as well. Or maybe it just wants to hear “Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap” again. Several people have expressed trepidation that the name “parasite” might give the little bugger the idea that it’s unwanted. Not unwanted. Shocking, sure. So from now on, I guess I’ll call it Montecore. Name that parasite!

7 responses to “My snout is cold and wet like that of a basset hound”

  1. There are many symbiotic relationships in the universe.
    we are parasites, yes I think yes.
    Those who express trepidation just fear the parasitic relationship.
    My lovely hostess is parasite free as of 12/9/2005
    or I should say the relationship has changed to one of an external nature.
    we couldn’t be happyerer.
    don’t eat the barf….but the cat might if you leave the bowl out long enough. they funny like that.


  2. I will never be able to keep my parasite safer than it is now. I’ll carry it in a sling, but somehow it won’t be the same. It’s a little sad, but somehow we manage, and maybe one day it will be smart enough to pick lice off me.

  3. Name it Spelt if it’s a boy and Amaranth if it’s a girl, so that it won’t offend those with wheat sensitivities.

  4. slings rule, I used ours until my little B was nearly 2.
    We even made and sold them for a while.
    I struggle with the protection issue as well. Still.
    As she gets on the Bus to go to kindergarden…who is that bus driver?
    it suckks………..but it’s cool she is an individual. She also reads at a 4th grade level.”Teaching them well = protection?” sort of?
    She made it 6 years w/o a scratch. Then on the first day of being home with our latest, she ran into a wall.
    nerves and emotions were frayed but she was fine.
    Lice are delicious, FACT!

  5. secretlyironic: i can’t go with commensal, since i sure as hell am not unaffected. yeah, i had to look that up, but i bet you did too!

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