Ah Melvin, that callous libertine. A lovable scamp with a heart of arsenic. He’s wormed his way into the filthy, undeserving hearts of quite a few readers, that’s for sure. Just know that he will always loathe you, no matter how much affection you heap at his well-manicured feet. Please feast your eyes on the new Galerie de Melvin, permanently located in the side bar.
Speaking of manicures, sandal season is upon us. Ladies and Gentlemen, start your pedicures! For the love of all that is right and good, pumice. Seek professional help as needed. But do not take your grooming to the extreme, I don’t want to see any more nail clipping on the subway.