So you're a miserable, insecure person who needs to be coddled, drawn out of your shell, or otherwise encouraged to take some damn action in your insignificant life. You need a tough-talking dame to grab you by the collar and slur "Straighten up and fly right, sonny!" through a haze of gin! You need a mother, a lover, a keeper. You need...Kitty Winn!

Go on now, don't be shy! Buck up and write to Kitty: kitty@vomitola.com



[Housekeeping Note: All advice for entertainment purposes only. All letters become the property of Vomitola.com and may be edited for length and clarity. No real names or email addresses will be revealed unless you specifically request publication of that data, and we don't know why you would as people will just laugh at you. Please choose a spiffy pseudonym or one will be assigned to you, most likely at your expense.

If you reallllly have a tough problem (Kitty doesn't do this for your health), here are a few other places to try, but we make no promises:

Salon, Since You Asked
Slate, Dear Prudence
The Village Voice, Savage Love (not that he's answered Lambchop's "burning" question yet!)
Rabbit Blog, Rabbit
The Onion, Advice Archive
Upside-down Hippopotamus, David and Goblin
Thanks,
-the staph]